Can I keep you forever + ever?

When you relocate to another country you can expect to learn many things about the "new" world around you - language, culture, rules of etiquette, style, food... whatever you thought you knew about a country is much different once you live and work there. Once the charm has faded, and it does even if you live in the most spectacular of European destinations, real life sets in and you are faced with the challenges and joys that real life brings in any country. As an expat living in Germany now for nearly 20 months, I've learned a lot about German life and culture, even European life in general, but I've learned something that I never imagined could be taught simply by moving to a new place.

 I've learned just how much I love this guy. See this face?



It may mean nothing to you to see this man. Sure, you may pass him and think he is smartly dressed, handsome, tall, etc. Though I'm guessing that on the street, you may walk right by him and not know just how special he is inside - beyond what you see -- and how much I truly love him. But this is the man that I found and wanted to marry when I was in my 20s, the man whom I've known since 1998, and the one with whom I'll be married to soon for 10 years on July 14, 2011.

That sweet face, those blue eyes, that man is the person with whom my heart belongs and always will. He shares everything with me and loves all shades of my often very complicated rainbow of a personality.

He is a good man, loving, gentle, kind, sensitive -- but also balanced, intelligent, creative, strong... Today we were at a spring fair and I looked over at him and snapped the above photo with my iPhone. When I got home and uploaded it to my computer, I looked into his eyes staring out from my screen, almost looking intentionally upon me there in my chair and I thought of how much I rely on him, need him and love him. I mean, hugely.

When you live abroad and feel upside down so many times, it's your loving partner and friend who can really make (or break) the experience. My husband has been great throughout this adjustment period for me. He is German, but he isn't German inside -- he is a mix of many cultures and I think this comes from his love for all things English, Irish and Scottish but also his experience living in America, particularly New England, for eight years. Plus, before moving to America he was always hanging around with, and fascinated by, his Italian and Spanish friends. He is German but not 100% connected to his own culture and life here, though he is very connected in other ways and it is his homeland so he'll always feel most comfortable and happy living in Hannover where he was born and raised. But despite having his home here, he can still relate to me -- he knows what it feels like to leave his land to set off for new shores with only a partner to rely on. Now that the tables are turned and I am exploring his culture, I can't help but love him more than I ever did before because of his support, friendship, encouragement, patience, and loads of unconditional love. He really looks out for me and I appreciate that more than mere words can express as love is so hard to express in words, much more so on a blog.

If you recently moved to a new city, state or country please pause a moment and think about how your partner has affected your experience and go give them a big kiss. We expats would have a much harder time without our loving families, wouldn't we?

Thorsten my dear, I plan to keep you forever + ever. 

(image: holly becker for haus maus)