I Have a Hebamme!

I have a Hebamme! A what? For non-German speakers out there, a Hebamme is what Americans will know by the term Midwife. I feel like shouting this very good news from the rooftops today because I'm feeling so happy and lucky to have found one - a great one - on the first try. So here's how it all began.

First. I have an ob/gyn that I don't like. At all. She was fine for the basic pap smear and bi-annual visits, but now that I'm pregnant she's just not "there" for me. As a result, I've spent the first 17 weeks of my pregnancy online googling stuff WHICH IS NEVER A GOOD IDEA. The internet is full of people who are not qualified to give medical advice who give medical advice like they are experts. Most expectant moms in forums are drama queens and scare the HELL out of you with every ache and pain meaning something traumatic and life-threatening. The web is loaded with horror stories about pregnancy, birth and beyond. I'm sure a few safe harbors exist, but I'm not interested in communicating with total strangers when I'm seeking medical advice.

Ok. So the one positive thing my doctor did was when she recently gave me a pamphlet listing local hebammes. I didn't know what that word even meant - she didn't bother explaining - so I went home and of course, GOOGLED it (like I did everything else pregnancy-related until now). I quickly learned about the German midwifery programs that exist here and how my insurance covers it 100% and that I need to find one ASAP. So I did more digging around and found a lady who is my age and who studied in Germany (she's German) but also London and did some of her midwifery training there in a London hospital. She lives in Hannover now and speaks fluent English and German - SCORE! Because honestly, no matter how much German I learn, I want this whole pregnancy process to be explained to me in English so I don't miss anything.

After finding her, I sent a quick intro email and within a few weeks, we chatted back and forth and I booked a coffee date with her and my husband at a local cafe yesterday. A few minutes into our conversation, I KNEW she was the person I wanted to work with. Really straight to the point, non-emotional but still warm and sweet, very professional and absolutely the type of woman that I want exploring this intimate journey with me. After all, the person who will introduce me to breast feeding and answer vagina questions (ha ha) needs to be someone that I feel comfortable with!

I "hired" her on the spot and she willingly accepted. It was a beautiful moment to not only like her but know that she also liked me. She stamped my "mutterpass" and she will now work with my insurance company - I don't have to pay her, the insurance company handles everything. What a relief! I've decided that I will still go to my monthly checkups with the ob/gyn because she does blood work, measuring, ultrasounds, etc. but my hebamme will be my wingman. And boy, did I need a wingman with my mother-in-law speaking mostly German and my mother living so far away in Boston and NONE of my friends are pregnant (or have been recently)....

She also makes me laugh - and that's more than my ob/gyn does. She told me STAY OFF THE INTERNET when I told her that I google stuff about pregnancy. She will be my new google. I feel relieved already.

The way it will work is that she'll come to my home (yes!) and check up on me as we book appointments - so she'll come between now and the time I deliver. Then, when I deliver (she doesn't deliver babies after this month), she will step in the moment I get home and she will come to my house (yes!) EVERY DAY for the first 10 days to help me with breastfeeding, baby care and questions, etc. How thrilled am I!? Very. THEN, after those 10 days, she can come (fully paid by the insurance) for up to 16 more visits during the first 6 months or so as needed. She also said that starting now, I can call, text or email her with questions anytime. How comforting!

I also found out through her that my insurance also covers classes that you can take to learn about baby care and fitness/exercise classes after I deliver. My plan covers my hospital stay with the baby and even my husband can stay overnight if we elect to get a private room - for a full 14 days. I mean, seriously? Now I know why people tell me that having a baby in Germany is the best. With a program like this, how can you complain?

So that's my hebamme story. I'll tell you more as time goes by but for now - I'm just so happy to have a co-pilot in all of this. I feel so incredibly happy and lucky since meeting her. I really needed someone to talk to AND NOT mommy forums and pregnancy websites!

Are you pregnant in Germany? Are you using a hebamme too? What has been your experience?

xo,
Holly