Asking For Sex

I'm popping in quickly to share another funny story, though it will be short and sweet because I'm very tired and don't feel like rambling this one time. But today I asked for sex. I meant to ask the waitress for a glass of sekt and she paused, smiled, and said in what would in English mean, "Excuse me?". I thought that when I heard my husband order champagne, or sekt, that he had said "secs" and so I was parroting him as I usually do to pretend I'm someone I'm not as I fake it to make it here in Germany. He was saying sekt, but you see with a German accent on the sharp kt at the end it can sound to an inexperienced American like secs but when I said it, it just sounds like sex. Well, no need to explain further. Holly has done it again. Well, perhaps I should add that I asked for sex (what should have been sekt) in front of the entire table at an anniversary party I was at. Had my mother been there, I would have made her SO PROUD. First I'm asking for squirrels at the bakery, then I'm asking for some ass, and now I'm asking for sex. What is my problem? :)

Comments

Lina said…
oh dear... german seems to be a tricky language to speak ;D
but veeeery funny ;P
Too funny. I have the same problem when I speak polish.
Stratos Bacalis said…
All those different pronunciations of s, t, and their combinations as well as the various x's can make one feel so inadequate... have always had the same problems myself...
Jessie said…
at least you got a great post title out of it!
Unknown said…
oh my... at least these little moments are bringing smiles to people all over the world, right?? :-)
I'm laughing with you not at you I swear!
Anonymous said…
oh, for sure u are not the only one. I always have the same problem too....YEAH, I really mean ALWAYS!!!!
Ich Liebe Dich is another one for me... I'm also a transplant just trying to survive (and hopefully learn) the language. But, I find it silly when I try to repeat what I've been taught...
maiapapaya said…
My husband is also German and I was there with him for the summer and made many similar mistakes!

The best one was when I was walking our dog and we met another dog, a pug, and I wanted to compliment it on its eyes. I wanted to say that it had funny/cute eyes, so I said "Oh, schöne eier!", accidentally mixing up the word for eyes (augen) with the word for eggs (eier). And of course, eier in German is slang for testicles! Just to make matters worse, the dog really did have, erm, schöne eier---he was an unneutered male!
Holly, you made me laugh so loud! I'm sure I would have made the same errors. Hubby has some grasp of the German language from high school classes, and when he tries to teach me a word or two I always butcher it. Give me French or Spanish any day! Thanks for the post; you made my morning! :)
Unknown said…
No problem. You are trying, that is more then most people do. They don't make mistakes, but they are not learning either.
Anonymous said…
This is so charming! I really love reading your American perspective on Germany...
Geisslein said…
That is SO funny! You´ve made my day today!!! Thank you for making me smile!!!
Eva said…
hihi! please do not attend any German language course, your stories are fun :)
PS I will not tell mine, however...
Jane said…
Hi Holly, I've been following your adventures with a lot of interest. We moved to Argentina when I was a kid, and my parents still talk about the mistakes they made while learning Spanish. It was a little easier for us kids, although I remember some bloopers I made as well. The hardest part of learning a new languages is feeling like a fool when you mess up. Babies make mistakes all the time, but nobody laughs at them when they do. I say, more power to you! A second language gives you a completely new perspective on the world (not just on your town) so is the best way to widen your horizons.
Jane
Pixie said…
These are great! lol...I'm so glad you share them with us and are able to laugh at your mistakes while learning from them.
This is so funny to me.. my Oma said that her pastor commented that she sure did talk about "sex" a lot..oh my as you can imagine she was mortified!! haha.. Another thing that she has a problem with is "fog"..the window is all fogged up..comes out mm a bit differently! hahaha. oh memories.. cute post~
Funny, I actually dated a German guy for a few years and I never learned! One time, in Munich, I asked where the bathrooms were. Well, the woman responded and I did not understand a word. But, she pointed... which helped. I headed in that direction, used the restroom and went to flush the toilet.... um... yea... it was a very old building and those toilets were "antiques" that were not to be used. I went into the wrong, relic bathroom instead!!! OMG!! I never told my former boyfriend this story. Whoa.
Oh my good lord.....if that isn't the funniest thing ever! Squirrels, ass and sex! Germany doesn't know what hit 'em! :)
xo
Melis
Etincelle said…
Haha, you make me laugh with the sex stories.... I love that kind of situation, as long as everybody ends up laughing of course!
but one story which make me laugh most is certainly maiapapaya's in the comment section. I can so truly picture the scene!!!
Thanks for all the good laugh :)
Oh Holly, you make me laugh :)

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